Love and it's conceptions

In the heterosexual world we've all grown up in, what is your concept of love (or an intimate interpersonal relationship), especially between two people of the same gender or as human beings in general? And how have you come to that idea or conception?

“Love is not in the stars to hold our destiny, but in ourselves” William Shakespeare. I think that lesbian and gay relationships have the potential to rock our entire world and its hopeless romantic notions of love and commitments. I think our LGBT community offers a true test to the status quo of relationships and that is, what does it mean when two people who are completely equal in every way want to be together? What does that relationship look like? How is it conceived in a world where gender roles have played a huge part in the make up of relationships; where your gender is the impetus for a relationship and what you do? Everything from courting behaviors, to duties in marriage and the later years, gender has become a pivotal piece to the make up of a relationship. Have you ever been asked by someone about your gay or lesbian relationship, “Who’s the man, and who’s the woman?” Culturally we don’t seem to be able to get away from this idea of gendered roles within a relationship.
When as a community, we challenge those core beliefs and ideas about the make up of love, I can’t help but feel invigorated and overwhelmed with the outcomes of what our love may mean for the greater world. Just imagine what a relationship would look like if duties and responsibilities within a relationship weren’t dictated by a person’s genitalia, but by the individual desires of either person within that loving bond. In a same sex couple, who opens the door on a date? Who pays? Who pulls out the other’s chair? Who proposes to whom? Who raises the kids? Who goes to work? Who does the dishes or mows the lawn, and on and on and on? The greater question is do these responsibilities have to be dictated by ones gender and what are the implications of this fact?
For me, it means that within a heterosexual or homosexual relationship, the bond becomes not about what roles are fulfilled, but about something deeper and much more important, and that is the human spirit. The interconnection between two people where what draws you to someone isn’t all of these societal expectations placed on us from birth, but the raw and uncensored emotion that is created between two people within any relationship. It means that whoever we are, we take more time to understand one another, to communicate effectively and understand in-depthly the person that you love. Love in its ideal becomes about the soul, the most authentic part of a person and a relationship is born out of ones interconnection with someone, rather than ones place in society as male or female. Love transcends all obstacles of oppression, power, and dominance within our world when we pause to value one another for all that we may bring to the table as one human being to another.
I have come to this world view through my own personal relationships with people; from the love of my family and friends to the very deep and raw emotions of falling in love and falling out of love. It is the depth of my heart and soul for people I care about that has helped me to appreciate the full range of what love could mean. Love to me impacts every relationship from the random person you meet on the street to the deepest and most intimate interpersonal relationships you may have for the rest of your life. When one acts in love, when one treats others with love, is when you acknowledge another person’s humanity.
If as a community we come to embrace one another in a human way; one that is free from degradation, objectification, and discrimination, then we can begin to have meaningful, deep and spiritual connections with other people. Because of this, our movement has the opportunity to change the world. It is our destiny to make love something of our own, something beautiful and wise. The greatest thing about being a gay or lesbian person is that our love has not been defined; a definition that can be as grand and colossal as we want it to be, a love that is so deep and true that it can never be broken. “Love and kindness are never wasted. They always make a difference. They bless the one who receives them, and they bless you, the giver” Barbara De Angelis.